Application for Editorial Positions on The Anchor

Directions: All applications are due to Ms. Donovan by Monday, May 2 by 3:00pm. Please scan and email your completed application or leave a hard copy on Ms. Donovan’s desk in the English office. If necessary, you may attach extra pages to this document to expand on your responses to the questions. Applicants must be able to attend all Monday lunchtime meetings (normally beginning around 12:15 pm).

Name: Dan Beckner                     Class Year: literally all of them.

List a maximum of three positions of interest (ranked by preference – see attached list): 

1. Prime Minister
2. Holy Patriarch
3. Sous-chef

Please explain why you would like to join The Anchor Editorial Board in this/these position(s).

• It is my intention to gradually take over all positions of power within this school (in this, my current incarnation) to reshape it in my image.

Please describe your previous involvement with The Anchor (staff positions, articles written, etc): 

• I have been reincarnated as every single human being through the history of the world, and I am currently in my last and final form.  Therefore, as I am/have been everyone in this school, I hold every single position at the Anchor and have since its creation.  My experience is therefore vast and unimpeachable, so it would be foolish to choose anyone else.

What are your strongest composition skills? What skills need improvement, and how can you address them? 

• I am flawless.

Anything else you would like to share: 

• Yes.  As prophesied, I shall rally humanity against our tyrannical Reptilian overlords and would like to spread the word through the Anchor’s subscription service.

3rd Qtr English grade: Depends on the particular reincarnation.          

Signature of English instructor: I’m too busy to secure one but given the fact that I AM all English teachers, I feel comfortable disregarding this absurd demand.